Pig Wisdom

Wisdom #1

As a young man was walking down a country lane he spotted an old farmer picking apples from his orchard and feeding them by hand to his pigs.

The young man felt obliged to comment to the old farmer and said, “Sir, you could save a lot of time by letting the pigs eat the apples from the ground when they fall off the tree.”

The old farmer thought about this for a moment and replied, “Young man, I thank you for the suggestion, but the truth of the matter is, time ain’t nothing to a pig.”

Wisdom #2

As a young man was strolling down a country lane he spotted a three legged pig wearing an artificial limb for a back leg. Intrigued by the sight he inquired at the farmhouse as to how the pig came to be wearing such a device.

After posing his questions the old farmer replied with a story of how that particular pig had saved the life of his grandson who had been drowning in the pond. The young man agreed that that was certainly a remarkable feat but failed to understand how saving the grandson had caused the pig to lose its leg.

The farmer then told how that exact same pig had saved the life of his wife when she was trapped in the pasture being charged and trampled by the bull. The young man agreed that that was certainly a remarkable feat but failed to understand how saving the wife had caused the pig to lose its leg.

The farmer, who was getting frustrated with the simpleton questions of the young man, replied, “Son, you just don’t eat a pig like that all at once.”


Wisdom #3

Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time
And annoys the pig.